A wedding is a big day, especially for a bride and groom who probably spent months (or even years) planning it. Many people wonder what to say to a bride on her wedding day, especially if they aren’t super close. Do you compliment her looks? Do you even say anything at all?
What Should You Say to a Bride on Her Wedding Day?
It’s a nice gesture to say something to the bride if you have the chance. Keep in mind that both the bride and the groom will be busy entertaining many guests on their big day, so they might not have the time to have a long conversation with you. Also, no guest, except the mother of the bride and her bridesmaids, should see the bride before she walks down the aisle.
No matter how close you are to the bride, don’t overthink it. It’s already nice that you are showing up to the wedding, and we thank you that the groom and bride invited you to the wedding.
Now, if you do indeed get a chance to talk to the bride, you can take one of the following approaches. Remember, keep it short and sweet. Don’t appear standoffish, but understand that the bride has a lot happening and can’t devote a ton of time to just one guest.
Compliment Her Looks
When in doubt, compliment the bride on her looks. Tell her something like, “wow, you look stunning” or “that dress looks amazing on you!” The bride will surely appreciate your kind words, as she has probably spent thousands of dollars on her dress, veil, hair, and makeup combined. That’s all it takes! Even if you force it out, make sure to try to come off sincere.
Say Positive Remarks About the Venue
If you want to continue talking to the bride or aren’t comfortable complimenting her on her appearance, you could say something positive about the wedding. When you compliment the venue, make sure your remarks come off as a compliment to the bride, not just the venue.
A few examples include:
- “Wow, you picked a beautiful place to get married.”
- “I love the colors of the venue.”
- “The flowers you picked look great at the venue.”
- “This venue suits you so well!”
Congratulate the Bride on Her Marriage
Even if you decide to compliment the bride on her appearance or say something nice about the venue, you should at the very least say “congratulations.” You’ve probably already said this to her, especially if you went to the bridal shower or engagement party. It’s also polite to congratulate the bride’s parents or tell them how great the wedding was.
If you don’t get the chance to congratulate the bride in person, you should make sure to give her a card (with some gift or cash). The bride and groom should have a place for gifts at the entrance of the venue.
Tell Her How Great the Cake Looks
After the wedding dress, the cake is often the second most crucial part of the wedding for the bride. She likely spent many days testing cakes from different bakeries. And don’t forget, wedding cakes can cost well over one thousand dollars these days. Again, make it sound like you are complimenting the cake that she picked. Don’t just say, “the cake tasted good.” Below is a list of much better ways to phrase a compliment about the cake:
- “The cake you picked looks beautiful!”
- “I love the colors that you chose for the cake.”
- “The cake you picked tasted amazing!”
- “I never tasted a cake so great before! You made a great choice.”
Some weddings have other types of desserts as well, including cupcakes. You can always throw them into the compliment, along with the main course. “The food you picked for tonight was amazing” or “I love the cupcakes you picked to go along with the cake; they were so cute!”
Ask Her How She’s Doing
As you can imagine, getting married is a massive deal for a woman, and the nerves begin to hit on the big day. If you’re closer to the bride, you can always ask her how she’s doing or feeling on her wedding day. If you’re with her throughout the day, make sure she’s doing okay. Say something along the lines of “are you feeling alright” or “how are you doing?”
Depending on how the bride replies, you should go out of your way to help her, if needed. If she appears stressed or overwhelmed, ask if you can help her with anything. Although a wedding will never be 100% perfect, you want to do your best to make it the best day possible for the bride.
What if You Can’t Go to the wedding?
If you can’t go to the wedding, you may not be able to talk to the bride on her big day. It depends on how close you are to her. For example, if you’re her brother or grandmother and you can’t make it, then calling her well in advance of the wedding is a nice gesture. However, if you’re not that close to the bride, it’s best not to call on the big day.
Unless you’re a family member or a very close friend, don’t overwhelm the bride before she’s about to get married. Sending her a letter saying “congratulations” along with some sort of gift is sufficient if you cannot make it to the wedding. If you want to speak to the bride in-person in person, or over the phone but can’t make the wedding, then you should talk to her either a few days before or after the wedding.
Don’t Forget about the Bridesmaid
In a way, the bridesmaids are an extension of the bride. These women are probably some of the closest people in her life –family members or very close friends. The bride even goes as far as to pick out the dress for her bridesmaids. You can either speak directly to the bridesmaids or the bride.
So, what should you say to the Bridesmaid? Here’s a list of some go-to compliments:
- “Wow, you ladies look beautiful!”
- “I love the dresses; you all look so great!”
- “Those colors look wonderful on you ladies!”
And if you are speaking with the bride directly:
- “I love the color of the dresses that you picked for your bridesmaids!”
- “The flowers you picked for your bridesmaids look so beautiful.”
- “You have a wonderful group of women in your life!”
Make Sure to Say Something to the Groom, Too
Even if you don’t know the groom very well, it’s always nice to say something to him as well. You’re at both the groom’s and bride’s wedding! A simple “congratulations” is sufficient. You should also shake the groom’s hand if you get the chance. Now, if you know the groom a little bit better, you could compliment him on his appearance or say how great his groomsmen look.
If you aren’t familiar with weddings, the groom doesn’t have much involvement with the décor and floral arrangements at the wedding, so you probably shouldn’t compliment him on any of these items.
Say “Thank You”
Whether it’s in person or writing, it’s always respectful to say “thank you” to both the bride and the groom. If you don’t get the chance to say it in person, try to say it to the bride’s parents. Weddings nowadays aren’t cheap, with many of them costing well over $20,000. Your plate of food probably cost at least $50, and even more, if the wedding had an open bar.
If you don’t get the chance to say “thank you,” don’t stress out. As long as you gave the bride and groomed a gift and congratulated them on their married, you won’t come off as disrespectful. However, if you are at a small and intimate wedding, you should go out of your way to personally talk to the bride and groom and thank them.
Make sure to say “thank you” to those working the wedding as well – the event planner, catering staff, and even the DJ and photographer if you get the chance. All of these people play a significant role in the wedding and make the magnificent event possible. Without them, there wouldn’t be a wedding.
Always Say Something Nice to the Bride or At Least a “Thank You”
No matter how close you are to the bride, it’s always important to say something nice to her.
Don’t worry too much about what you should say to the bride on her wedding day. If you can’t make it to the wedding, then be sure to send a letter or give her a phone call a few days before or after the wedding. The bride has probably been dreaming about getting married since she was a little kid, and the more people compliment her, the better her experience is. The bride should feel special and loved on her big day. After talking to the bride, do your best to speak with the groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen, and family members of the bride and groom.